BubbaSmith.net » Relationships

Social Media Could Ruin Your Life

bubba — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 13:44:25 +0000

¹⁷ And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father. – Colossians 3:17

Yesterday I said that social media is like money, it’s neutral. Whether or not the use of it will result in a positive or negative outcome is entirely up to the user. Today I want to focus on the negative aspect of social media. Here are my thoughts:

You Could Waste Your Life - How much time do you spend on Facebook? How much time do you spend on other people’s pages wishing you were them, could date them, had as many friends as them? How much time do you spend building a reputation online that isn’t even close to what your real life is? Just some thoughts…

You Could Destroy Your Reputation – Ultimately – this really comes down to how you live your life on a daily basis. If you don’t live a life of integrity and make unwise decisions, most likely whether it’s through pictures or people talking through social media, the entire world is going to find out, and what’s worse, once it’s out there, you can’t get it back.

You Could Miss Out on Your Dream Job - Resume’s are boring -> companies would rather google you. What does Google say about you? Twitter? Your Facebook account? Your pictures? Social media will tell more about you than a resume ever will. If you were an employer and you saw your pictures or googled your name, would you hire you?

You Could Destroy Relationships - There is danger in how connected we can be through social media. Married people could connect with lovers from high school, you can send love messages to people who are in a relationship and see if they’ll leave who their with to be with you… Basically: it’s a place that could lead to some very bad decisions if you don’t have boundaries in place or apply wisdom.

It Could Kill Your Business, Church, Organization - How often do you check what people said about a product or restaurant before you bought it or visited? When people visit your business, church, or organization, they will talk about it. They will talk about it online and over time, the more people that talk, the more your companies reputation is effected through viral marketing of your customers. It’s either going to be good or bad, if it’s bad and you don’t do anything to change that… you’re not going to last very long.

These are just a few ways social media could ruin your life…..What am I missing?

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This is to have Succeeded

bubba — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 18:53:42 +0000

“Let your lives be built on Him . . . then you’ll overflow with thankfulness.” -Col. 2:7

“The blessings of the Lord makes a person rich, and he adds no sorrow with it.” – Proverbs 10:22

Everybody wants to enjoy life. God wants us to enjoy life. I know a lot of people who have the desire to enjoy life, but aren’t. Often we are looking for joy, success, and happiness in all the wrong places. I’ve found that enjoying life comes from:

Having a relationship with God – this is the foundation and fulfillment of true joy and happiness.

Having great relationships - There isn’t anything more important in our lives than our relationships with others – cherish and cultivate them.

Recognizing that changing a life, not drawing a crowd, is true success.

Creating great experiences and memories – not gaining more material possessions. Create them often.

Living with High Standards, Integrity, and Character - I live my life according to the Bible. God created us and He knows the way we should live to enjoy life. He gives it to us in His Word!

Serving - “A life not lived for others, is hardly a life.” -Mother Theresa

Giving your life for others – right now I give my life to the students at Revolution – I love all of them so much and it is one of the greatest joys to go through life with them, pour into them, and have them pour into me.

I think Ralph Waldo Emerson sums it up well:

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of earnest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Are you enjoying life? If not, start doing some of the things I mentioned and watch as joy comes into your life.

What have you found joy and happiness come from?

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Book Review: 25 Ways to Win With People

bubba — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 15:11:49 +0000

Probably one of the most influential people in my life has been John Maxwell – and I’ve never met him (Definitely a bucket list item). I’ve had this book on my shelf for a few years, it’s a companion to John’s book: Winning With People (I’d highly recommend that one as well. I pulled this off my shelf because of one of my mentors, Jeanne Mayo. Last week I got back from a mentoring retreat with 40 other youth pastors at her house. She is absolutely incredible at winning with people. I recognized that I need to do more on purpose when it comes to connecting and winning with others, so I picked up this book.

This book is a must read! It’s written by Les Parrot and John Maxwell. Les basically interviewed people that were close to John and asked them why he is so good with people. They came up with 25 principles John practices. The first half of each chapter is Les telling a story he heard from one of John’s staff while the second half is John teaching about the principle. I don’t care if you’re naturally a people person – Read this book! It will help you win with people.

Here are the 25 Principles You’ll Learn:

Start with Yourself
Practice the 30 Second Rule
Let People Know You Need Them
Create a Memory and Visit it Often
Compliment People in Front of Other Peopel
Give Others a Reputation to Uphold
Say the Right Words at the Right Time
Encourage the Dreams of Others
Pass the Credit onto Others
Offer Your Very Best
Share a Secret with Someone
Mine the Gold of Good Intentions
Keep Your Eyes off the Mirror
Do for Others What They Can’t do for Themselves
Listen with Your Heart
Find the Keys to Peoples Hearts
Be the First to Help
Add Value to People
Remember a Person’s Story
Tell a Good Story
Give with No Strings Attached
Learn Your Mailman’s Name
Point out People’s Strengths
Write Notes of Encouragement
Help People Win

Final Grade: 10/10 Buy Here

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Crumbs – Perry Noble

bubba — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 22:50:11 +0000

Beautiful_01 Crumbs Outtake from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

This clip is a few months old and I just watched it again and I wanted to share it with you. Hope it helps!

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Must Listen to Message on Boundaries

bubba — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 19:51:00 +0000

If you’re single, dating, or married – you need to listen to this message.

It will help you set standards and boundaries in your life and your relationships.

It is the third message in the series entitled: “Living on the Edge”

It will add a ton of value to your life – I promise!

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My Trip to Atlanta: Life Changing

bubba — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 23:24:00 +0000

The Cadre: Phoenix Fall Retreat

I’ve mentioned it before, but I am in a youth ministry mentoring program with Jeanne Mayo called The Cadre. It is a program where Jeanne mentors youth pastors all over the country and twice during the year you get to fly down to her house to hang out with her and the other youth pastors in the group. If I had to summarize my 3-day experience in Atlanta in two words it would be: Life Changing. I won’t go into detail on everything we did (if you’d like to know ask me in person), but I would like to leave you with some lessons I learned and some things God did in my heart:

The Power of Love - if I had to describe Jeanne Mayo in a word, it’d be love. As I watched hundreds of people call her “mom”, I realized the power of loving others. She is a mom to everyone that comes into her life. I asked Jeanne how she got to where she is today and her response was, “I’ve made the decision to add value to people everyday”. In other words – she chose to love people everyday and as a result thousands of teenagers, twenty somethings, and youth pastors lives have been changed.

The Power of Family – I love learning about raising great families (because I’m preparing for mine!!!). As I looked around Jeanne’s house I could tell family was at the top of her priority list.
One thing that really stuck out to me was a “Mayo Family Creed” a document with 11 or 12 principles on it that defined their family and that they live by. The whole family had to sign it and at her sons wedding, he got a framed copy and had his wife sign it (that fires me up!). Her son actually wrote a book on how he was raised… they were very strategic with raising their family and it worked – I can’t wait for mine!

The Power of Relationships – One of the things I enjoyed the most about the trip was forming and building new relationships. I met pastors and students from all over the country who love God. I would have paid a million dollars for that part of the experience. Having friends that I can go to that don’t know everything going on in Pittsburgh and I can be totally transparent with and they’ll love me for who I am. I love everybody I met!

The Power of Refreshment – I’m now convinced that we need to take retreats once or twice a year away from everything and just take time reflecting on our lives, meeting new people, and get refreshed. This was one of those weeks!

My Future Wife – Someone spoke into my life about this – they said… You think having a wife will fill a need in you only God can fill. Unless you fill that void with God, you’ll get married and be terribly disappointed because you’d be expecting your wife to fill a void that she was never created to fill. (Sick stuff!)

The Unlimited Potential of Young People – There were over 80 Masters Commission students ages 18-23 serving us for the week. These are some incredible people who love God with all of their heart. Seeing what God was doing in and through them go me so pumped up I can’t even put it into words. They are all going to go on and be world changers – we really do need to believe in the upcoming generation.

Respect – Jeanne “slapped” me in this face with this one. She said, “Some of you are sarcastic and try being funny all the time because that is how you find security. You need to quit that – if you want people to respect you and take you seriously – grow up and be secure in who you are.” That hit me deep… reminds me of the whole “Am I going to be a leader or a clown” lesson.

Wherever you are – Be there – Jeanne stressed this principle! This is something I struggle with – a thousand things always going through my mind and I’m not always “there”. She not only taught it, but modeled it. Making every second count – I need to work on this.

Legacy – The Cadre (youth pastor mentoring) is the legacy Jeanne Mayo wants to leave behind. A legacy of raising up leaders who will raise up leaders and change the world. It was amazing to see this unfolding before my eyes – I was seeing a legacy being lived out. I would love to do a mentoring group like this one day… What do you want your legacy to be?

I learned about 10,o00 other things and had one of the most incredible experiences of my life at Jeanne’s. I wish I could go on, but once again, I’ve seemed to blog too much!!! I’ll probably have more to come on this series… stay tuned.

Ask anything Friday tomorrow…get ready!

Love you guys – I missed all of you! – Bubs

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The Road to Chicago (Part 4)

bubba — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 22:28:00 +0000

The Power of a Partner

“A genuine friend encourages and challenges us to live out our best thoughts, honor our purest motives, and achieve our most significant dreams.”

-Dan Reiland

Another one of the big lessons I learned throughout the whole marathon training process was the power of a partner. Pastor Larry has been my mentor since I graduated high school in 2003. Since then we’ve done so much together and now not only is he still one of my mentors, but he is also a great friend. We decided to run this marathon together in January and we’ve taken the journey together over the past 10 months. I’ve had so many great talks with PL over our 3-4 hour long runs on Saturday mornings and I could not have done everything we’ve done if he had not been by my side.

If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in Heaven will do it for you. For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.

-Matthew 18:19,20

Is there anything more important than who we take the journey of our lives with? From family, to friends, to who we marry. You will go no further in life than the people you surround yourself with. That is an absolute fact.

So ask yourself… do you have friends, family members, and a possible significant other that encourages and challenges you to live out your best thoughts, honor your purest motives, and to achieve your most significant dreams?

If not I suggest taking the advice of one professional speaker, “My friends told me I could never be a professional communicator. So I did something about it. I went out and got some new friends.”

Who are you partnering with?

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Time Management (Part 3)

bubba — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 10:32:00 +0000

Those Who Start the Journey with you Seldom Finish with You

If you’re anything like me you have an incredibly hard time telling people no or telling them something they do not want to hear. Because of this I often find myself “overbooking” my schedule to please people. In elementary school, middle school, high school, and even for some off college it seemed as if I had an infinite amount of time to spend with people, so I would hang out with as many people as I could as often as I could. As I continue in life’s journey I am finding that the more you continue to grow in life the more important your time is and how you spend your time. You end up having to choose very intentionally who to spend time with and what you spend your time doing. Craig Groeschel had a great post on this.

i.e. Right now I am running a marathon, working 30 hours a week at church, I’m a full time college student, and go to Bible School. I have less time to spend with people now then I did when I was in high school and only had a 7 hour school day. When I get married, I’ll need to spend a ton of time with my wife so my time will be even more limited…etc.

I often have people challenge me that I only spend time with “big dogs” or “people that can add value to me” and that bothered me incredibly. I would scream inside, “I only have so much time in a week, month, year, etc… and everyone wants my time and if I don’t give it to them then I’m the bad guy… I CAN’T PLEASE EVERYBODY….AHHHHH.”

I’ve discovered that it’s a fact that:

“You will go no further than the people you surround yourself with”
“You show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future”
“You attract who you are, not who you want”

I guess what I am finding is this:

“People who have nothing to do usually want to spend their time with you!”

“Those Who Start the Journey with you Seldom Finish with You”

Friendships in life develop and are constantly changing as you go through seasons of life. I am convinced that “best friends” should be able to not see each other for years, and yet they’ll get together and it will be like they’ve never left. Yet so many people make the assumption that it will always be like the “good old days” and they get upset when it’s not. Unfortunately these people end up missing out on the journey because they refuse to go on and accept change. Even when you do give them time, they end up wasting it by complaining about how it isn’t like the good old days (this drives me insane…Grow and Get a Life!)

I want to spend my time wisely with people who:

Can constantly challenge me to dream, go after God, and change the world
Are going somewhere in life and understand the value of time
Are a blast to hang out with
Don’t spend 90% of their conversations complaining
Will treat me the same even if they haven’t seen me in years

If I spent time with everybody who wants my time… I’d burn out, would never have time alone, would never have devotions, and would never be effective in life. I love what Paul said:

“Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.”
-Galatians 1:10

If I am not intentional with how I spend my time and who I spend it with… I will miss out on so much of what God has for me…I’m here to please an audience of One!

Realize I am not talking about spending time with people who are hurting and need counseling and things of that nature… I am talking about my personal life.

What are your thoughts on this subject?

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Sunday Night Reflections 9.14.08

bubba — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 21:25:00 +0000

It’s been a pretty sweet week… here are some thoughts:

New Season of Rev- Today we had our last service without a youth pastor. It’s been a little over a year of Sean, Zack, and I running youth. I am excited for a new season of Rev and to see it go to another level. I just helped move in our new youth pastor (Nathan Hurst), he is a great guy and I am pumped to see God work through him!

19 North - Zack and Lauren and doing a whole month series called “Co-Ed” which is on sex, dating, and the single life. It’s a great series. Last night ZB took talked to the ladies and Lauren talked to the guys. I would recommend listening to the podcasts! Also, we’re having the first ever Silver Ring Thing 20-something event at Victory through 19 North this Friday. Do not miss that!

Redefining Relationships – Craig Groeschel had a great blog series this week on redefining relationships. He talked about how the bigger a church gets, the bigger our families become, and as we just grow up in life, we have to constantly be redefining our relationships with people. I’m just starting to see this in ministry and I am realizing it is a very hard thing to go through. Craig’s insight really helped me out.

Loves Correction and Submission and Authority – I’ve been feeding on these two series by Keith Moore… they pretty much rocked my world. Everyone (especially young leaders) need to listen to these two series (along with all of Keith Moore’s series!!)

Fear Factor – So we’re having a month long Fear Factor competition at Rev. It’s been crazy! We had our 2nd round this past Wednesday and made students bob for worms in all kind of nasty junk. It was a blast and I’m pumped for next week… only 4 contestants left!

I’m going out to watch the Steelers game with some great friends tonight… until next time! Love you guys!

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What Matters Most (Part 2)

bubba — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 13:13:00 +0000

“I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters, you were doing it for me.” -Matthew 25:40

I want to share a story of something that happened to me recently that had an amazing impact on me:

I was out with a bunch of friends (I will not use names) . . . at the end of the night one friend had some circumstances come up in which I had to stay with them after everyone left. Selfishly, my first thought was… this stinks… I want to go home (I had nothing of importance to do…honestly I wanted to play Super Mario Galaxy). I sat their . . . annoying thoughts running through my head, when suddenly I looked over at my friend and they had burst into tears. We started talking, I gave them a hug, and I ended up praying with them over the next half hour.

As he was leaving that night he turned me and said, “Bubba, God is so good . . . I guess he can take something horrible, and turn it into something wonderful.”

I thought to myself, what if I had just left, what if I wouldn’t have talked with them, hugged them, and prayed with them. My heart starting breaking, one because I almost missed that amazing opportunity to share God’s love with someone, second, that I have not been making what is important to HIM important to me. I am making the decision to refuse to settle for anything less now than what is important to Him now. This is another one of those life changing things happening in my life right now… so what about you?

Do you find yourself pressing ignore on your phone because you don’t want to be bothered? You’re too busy to spend time with someone in need? When someone wants to talk to you about something they’re going through do you automatically have thoughts like, “I do not want to do this right now… maybe later . . . go see someone else . . . leave me alone!”

I think it’s time we all evaluate what matters most… and make sure what matters to HIM, matters to us.

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