“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the GOOD of those who love God and are called according to His purpose.”        -Romans 8:28

Steps

Get in a Good Church – Once you’ve made the God decision, you need to get in a good church that actually teaches the Bible. Unfortunately, it’s because of the teaching of a lot of churches that we even have to make the God decision. You must know that God is good, He loves you, and He has a great plan for your life.

Surround Yourself with People that Will Give You the Truth -As I said yesterday, getting around friends and family is great, but it’s not enough. As far as surrounding yourself with people – you need to get around people who will speak the Word of God into your life, encourage you, push you through, and enable you to see that there really is a bright future ahead of you.

Take Your time Grieving, But Then Move On – it is perfectly ok to grieve and let your emotions go for a period of time. The problem is people who let it go on for years and years and never move on. In II Sam. 12:15-23 it talks about David grieving over His son while he was ill, but once his son passed away, he went back to normal life,there was nothing more he could do. I’m not saying you forget about the person or won’t miss them, I’m simply saying that you don’t let the emotions take control of you any longer than necessary.  Have people help you through this process…

Be Thankful for the Time You Did Have with Them - So many times we focus on all the things we won’t get to do with that person. “They won’t be at my wedding, see my kids, etc.” while this is true, we never focus on the time we did have with them, most likely because we took it for granted. When you become thankful for all the good times you had with them and all the time you got to spend with them, it really helps you though the process.

Tomorrow I want to talk about the impact the loss of a loved one should have on you….

Thoughts?

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the GOOD of those who love God and are called according to His purpose.”                                                                       Romans 8:28

Who Do You Run To?

When I lost my mom I ran to my friends, I ran to alcohol, I ran to drugs to relieve the pain, I tried to ignore everything that was happening. Everything I tried seemed to leave me empty and with even more pain. Sure, I could temporarily get rid of the pain, but I’d still have to wake up the next day. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t escape the reality that I lost my mom.

Friends and Family Weren’t Enough - while having hundreds of friends and family members around to comfort me was great, they didn’t really help. An hour after the funeral they we’re all eating potato salad and having a good time while patting me on the back saying, “it’ll be ok”. To which I’d think, “You have no idea if it’ll be ok – you’ve never lost your mom, don’t tell me…” Nearly weeks after my mom passed the phone calls stopped, the visits,  the sympathy, people did what they should do – returned to their normal lives. The only problem was . . . I was still struggling with nowhere to run and hurting so bad inside…

The God Decision - Essentially you have to choices when you go through storms as big as this one in life. Either blame God and run from Him while holding all of the pain inside (dealing with it on your own), or believe God is good, embrace His love, and run to Him. Most people blame Him and run from Him, and to be honest – when they choose this path – their lives end up sucking and they never truly get through grieving. Everybody must choose in the midst of battle – (You can read the story of my decision in my “About Me” section.)

God was and is More than Enough -Through some “only God” moments in the process – I chose to run after and surrender my pain and emptiness to God. That was the greatest decision I’ve ever made. God took away all of my pain and gave me a peace in my heart that to this day I can’t explain any other way than “only God”. I’m telling you – THERE IS NO OTHER WAY to deal with pain, emptiness, loneliness, regret, bitterness, etc. in your life than to run to God. HE IS THE ANSWER (Romans 7:25)

Bottom Line – You’re going to run to God (The Answer – Romans 7:25) or run to something (drugs, friends, etc) that will never help you. The choice is yours, but in my mind it is a no brainer.

Tomorrow I’ll go over the “Musts” of Grieving – Practical things to do AFTER you’ve decided to run to God.